My Why

I have been married to a first responder for almost twenty years who still gives me butterflies and gets me weak in the knees. Together we have three children, the greatest gifts who fill our hearts and home with immeasurable joy. 

Twenty years ago, when we started a First Responder Family, I had no idea what we were walking into.

I knew all too well the risk of line of duty injury and death. My uncle, an RCMP officer, died in the line of duty. 

I was not aware losing a First Responder to Suicide was a higher risk of death than in the line of duty. Personally experiencing suicidal ideation of police officers, firefighters and paramedics I love, opened my eyes. 

It was not on my radar that Operational Stress Injury or Post Traumatic Stress Injury was the biggest risk factor for First Responders with Secondary Stress for their Spouses and Children. Until it became our story as a First Responder Family.

I didn't realize..

That we would....

• have anxious kids who couldn’t sleep, worried about their daddy's safety.
• face the challenge of keeping the house quiet while he slept after a night shift.
• leave events early (after spending hundreds of dollars) as a person a few seats down was recently arrested by my husband.
• have a code word to split up in the mall in the event of seeing more bad guys. 

That he would...

• create a new occupation at every social event.
• get asked for "work stories", "if he knew a guy" or told about the latest "traffic ticket" if people found out what he really did at said social event.
• recall a handful of prior crime scenes along the drive for a family outing.
• become triggered while working on a homicide as the little boy looked similar to our son.
• witness the very worst of human behavior with all of his senses, imprinted deep in his memory.

That I would...

• feel overwhelmed, exhausted and depressed.
• isolate myself from friends and family. 
• lose my joy, stop doing the things I loved. 
• wash sweat soaked bed sheets on a daily basis.
• wake in the middle of the night to pace with him encouraging him to breathe.

Does Any Of This Sound Like You?  Yah, I've Been There

This Is Why I Created The First Responder Family Wellness Center, To Help First Responder Families Build Resilience Strategies.   

When my first responder husband developed Post Traumatic Stress Injury, even though I was a social worker with mental health training, I didn't recognize the signs until it had gotten out of hand.

We chose to seek counselling, read books and research what works for families. Along with the support of family, friends and professionals we were able to get our family back to a place we were happy with.

Taking the framework and strategies we developed to help our family, I began to help First Responder Families 1:1.  As a result The First Responder Family Wellness Center was born to globally help First Responder Families.

Our goal is to reach new and seasoned First Responder Families, wherever they live, to provide a place to come together for community, support and hope from using resilience strategies that work. 

What I Learned

• Going THROUGH hard things can bring growth, learning, strengthen your relationship with yourself and deepen the connection with those you love like nothing else in life. DON’T GIVE UP! IT GETS BETTER! 
• Love Always Wins! 
• Loving someone fiercely especially when they don’t deserve it!
• Prioritizing and Living From Your Values Simplifies Life Decisions.
• Taking care of ourselves (mind, body, soul) is crucial before we can take care of others.
• 10% of people won’t like us no matter what we say or do. It doesn’t matter. YOU DO YOU!
• Surrounding ourselves with people who get us, love us when we are messy, tell us the truth when we steer off path, hold us accountable to live our best self, come and fold laundry to help our overwhelm and accept us at our worst are the JOY GIFTS in life!
• Breathing deeply makes everything temporarily better.
• As parents working on our emotional wounds, pain stories from the past helps us raise healthy, secure, adjusted and resilient kids. FULL STOP.
• Family is everything! This fight you are in to take back your family- IT’S WORTH IT!

On Our Farm

We started as a First Responder Family of two twenty years ago. Today, we are five, with a whole lot of animals to love!

About Me

I am born and bred in the beautiful province of Newfoundland and Labrador. As a family, during my childhood, we moved six times. This allowed me the opportunity to live in some of the most beautiful parts of the province, amongst the kindest hearts. 

My favourite part of everyday is with my family. 

Currently, I work privately in clinical practice and publicly as a therapist. I love my work. I truly believed it was my purpose from a very young age.

Everyday, I am honoured to:

• be trusted with life stories of deep pain, broken dreams and intense struggles
• to learn so much from witnessing bravery, perseverance, resilience hope and healing.

 Other things I love:

• the process of creating  and learning new art forms
• Autumn, the colour and crispiness of the leaves
• reading a book, the smell and feel, prevents me from going electronic
• writing
• hugging
• coconut milk lattes
• theatre
• dark chocolate
• acupuncture
• yoga
• meditation
• the ocean
• learning
• acoustic guitar
• looking at the stars
• lying in a hammock
• being in nature
• anywhere with my family and friends. 

 My hope is here you will find a safe place:

• feel welcome 
• find relief from your burdens
• put down the weight you've been carrying, for a short time
• a name for your struggles
• hope and perspective 
• understanding you are not alone
• a place to take a few deep breaths, refocus and reframe
• encouragement to keep going
• support from someone who has been there, walking beside you
• connection with others walking this journey
• encouragement to keep moving forward on this messy path. 
• YOU CAN DO THIS!

LICENSING & MEMBERSHIPS:

Alberta College of Social Workers Psychosocial Intervention Private Practice #3068 

Canadian Counselling and Psychotherapy Association Membership #10005829

International Association of Trauma Professionals

International Association For SandTray Therapy

Trauma Center Trauma Sensitive Yoga - Center for Trauma and Embodiment Consultation Group Member

SOCIAL WORK EDUCATION:

University of Victoria, 2003

Mount Royal University, 1999

CERTIFICATION & TRAINING:

EMDR Therapist

Trauma Family Professional Certification 

Cognitive Behavior Therapy

Mindfulness CBT

Acceptance and Commitment Therapy

Motivational Interviewing

Solution Focused

Sand Tray/ Play and Art Therapy

200 hour Certified Yoga Instructor- Yoga Home

Trauma Informed Yoga -Center for Trauma and Embodiment

Meditation Coach

How We Can Work Together